Ashley and Nevaeh: Reaching a Healthy Balance

Rachael: Welcome to Formative, the show where today's leaders are interviewed by the leaders of tomorrow.

To help us wrap up season 7 of Formative, we have Ashley Parke joining us on the show today. Ashley is a content creator in the fashion space. Today we talked to her about her style, how she was able to stand out in a saturated influencer market and how she maintains her confidence. We're thrilled to have Ashley on the show today.

Rachael: Hello and welcome. I'm Rachael Gazdick, CEO of New York Edge, and my co-host today is Nevaeh from M.S. 522K. Hi, Nevaeh. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself?

Nevaeh: Hi, my name is Nevaeh Jackson and I'm a 7th grader at Mott Hall IV. Something I'm really good at is dancing. That's something that I'd like to see in my future. And also, what I also like to do in my free time is listen to music while I do my homework. 

Rachael: I love that, Nevaeh. Who are we going to be interviewing today? 

Nevaeh: Today we're going to be speaking to Ashley Parke. I'm very excited to be speaking to her today. 

Rachael: Alright, so let's bring her in. Ashley Parke, welcome and thank you so much for being here.

Ashley: Thank you for having me. 

Rachael: Nevaeh, I'll hand it over to you. What's your first question for Ashley? 

Nevaeh: Um, my first question is, what's your favorite part about being a fashion influencer and running your own brand? 

Ashley: My favorite part? Well, initially my favorite part was not having to be in an office every day. Um, once you find your rhythm, it's limitless. The possibilities are endless and you really can make anything happen. I like the idea of having a very flexible schedule. I like the idea of me being able to make my own hours and work when I feel like it. That's what I thought. It turns out I work a lot more than I was working before, but it's a lot more enjoyable.

Nevaeh: Okay. How do you stay up to date with the latest fashion trends and how can students do the same? 

Ashley: I really only look to trends to see if something interesting or maybe a new twist on something that already existed because I really don't believe that anything is new with fashion. There's a lot of recycling and it can be repetitive sometimes.

So I really just look to the trends to see if there's anything new or interesting happening with things that have already been happening. Um, and if there's something that I like, I will look to see what's trending because when something's trending, I can find it a lot easier. But I really don't like the trends to dictate my style because I like to just dress how I feel.

Nevaeh: Okay. Next is, can you share some tips for middle school students who wants to develop their own sense of style? 

Ashley: Yeah, I know that it's easy to be influenced by everything we see on social media. But I think just experimenting and trying different styles is how you figure out what you like. And it's okay to change what you like as well.

And I think sometimes people feel like they have to stick to a certain style if it's popular or trending. And maybe you feel like that's something you want to wear because a lot of your friends might be wearing something. But I think it's important that you just wear what makes you feel good. 

Before my career in social media, I was inspired by, like, television shows and movies. When I was a little girl, I used to watch a lot of old movies with my grandmother. And I did feel inspired by a lot of the fashion that I saw. And I think at the time, I really wasn't able to realize how it did inspire me or how it influenced me. But now looking back, I did pull a lot from those kinds of things as well. So, really everything is inspiration. 

Nevaeh: What inspired you to start Parke Avenue? Like, was your dream always to become a fashion influencer? 

Ashley: No, actually. I mean, if you were to ask my younger self if I was going to be a fashion influencer, no. I didn't dream of a career in fashion. I didn't even know that I could have a career in social media. I always thought that I would graduate, like, high school, go to college, and then get a job in corporate. Anyone in my life that influenced me up until college, they were people who worked in corporate, they were the most successful people that I saw. So I thought that's what I needed to do. And then I did that and I realized that's not what I want to do.

So while I was working in corporate, I would get compliments on my outfits that I was wearing to work. And my then boyfriend, who is now my husband, he really inspired me to take it seriously. And he was like, why don't you just record your outfits? If you want to do it, why don't you just do it? And so I started just sharing my outfits on YouTube, what I was wearing into the office every day. And then more and more people started to see my videos and they would ask me questions and then I would have content that I could create based off those questions that they were asking me. And it kind of just grew into something bigger than I even realized could happen. 

Rachael: How did you balance your 9 to 5 job and working on your fashion content? And was making that transition difficult for you? 

Ashley: Okay, so my job, when I was working in corporate, I was a research analyst for a media company. And, um, it just was a job that I kind of fell into rather than a job that I felt just worked for me, you know? 

So, I was doing both for a while. And I balanced it by working on the weekends. I would create, like batch create all my content on the weekends and sometimes after work, but I had very long work days and sometimes it would be a little bit intense. So it was hard for me to create content after work, but I, you know, I really wanted to make the transition out of working in corporate. And once I started seeing that I can make money doing fashion content creation, I realized that I needed to pour more into it. So I would just, every weekend I will be working on my fashion content. 

And, um, juggling everything was just getting overwhelming. So one day I just was like, you know what? I need to leave my job because it's not actually what I want to do, leave my corporate job. It's not really what I want to do. So I don't really need to continue doing something that is just not for me. And I would like to focus on creating content because it was feeding me, um, creatively and it was also feeding me financially. 

So it was, it was difficult for me to wrap my head around it, to be honest, because the way you get paid is so different than how you get paid in corporate. It's like nothing is guaranteed. So it was, I was very unsure about all of it, but I just knew it was something I wanted to try. 

Nevaeh: What advice do you have for someone who wants to pursue a career in fashion like you have? 

Ashley: I would say that right now, you have so much room to play and experiment and have fun. Obviously, you need to take your studies seriously because, you know, at the age where you're in school, prior to college, I feel like these are your formative years. And even though we're still forming outside of those years, these are the years where you're learning, you know, basic skills that you would definitely need for life. 

So while you're in school, you can experiment with social media. You can be building your brand. You can be sharing your experience as a high school student. And when you go into college, you can be sharing your experience as a college student because there are so many people who are just looking for someone to relate to. So before you are jumping out and say, you know, I just want to be an influencer or a fashion creator or an artist, a designer, whatever those things are right now while you're in school, you can be doing that on the side, no pressure. Not to make any money, not to get any brand deals, not to figure out how this is going to help you financially. You can really just create freely. And this is the time where you can really be building your audience and not have any pressures to do anything else. And I think that's what you should be thinking about. Not worrying about, you know, I want to be an influencer so I got to plan that right now. Cause you don't have to.

Nevaeh: What was some of the early mistakes that you had in your career and how did you fix them? 

Ashley: Okay. In social media, I saw a lot of people would go viral or when you post a video and you get millions and millions of views and likes and things like that. And that's not how it always is. It's a very long steady game. And at the time, it just felt like it was taking so long to do when I knew that it was something that I really wanted to be my full time career. And I was kind of getting discouraged and I had moments where I was feeling like it wasn't going to happen. 

In the beginning, sometimes you just look to other people for an example of what maybe you can accomplish or what maybe is just possible. But I also, once I didn't get where I thought I should be within a certain period of time, I was starting to compare myself to that person and it felt like I was diminishing what I had accomplished. So I would say an early mistake that I made was just comparing myself to people. 

Nevaeh: Do you ever get tired of being too online? And how do you balance your online and offline life? 

Rachael: Yeah, and how do you maintain a healthy relationship when it can be stressful because it's your actual job? 

Ashley: Yeah, because it definitely can, but um, there are times where I'll just try to just stay off of my phone, and if I post something and it doesn't do well, or if it doesn't do what I think it should do, you just gotta keep going.

You just keep posting, get off your phone, and you just realize after you're doing it for a little while that social media is a highlight reel, so you're only gonna see the rest of whose ever, uh, content or things like that. So you just got to keep going, keep posting, but try not to let it consume you. If it is your job, then treat it like a job. Meaning, you know, you try to have certain times where you're dedicating time to it and you try to get away from it and have time where you're not working on it. 

Rachael: Oh, that's right. We all have to be making sure to balance it in a way that works for us. 

Nevaeh: For me personally, like when I'm online, I see the same thing over and over and over and over and over. I feel like people being like on the internet and stuff, it's like affecting with like, for example, like for a student, if they're on the internet, on their phone, on the device every single day, every single night. all day, 24/7, that could kind of interfere with their learning and interfere how they can focus in school. And let's say they just, they're in class and they zone out and they start thinking about something that they did on their phone or what they did online. 

Ashley: Try to, you know, have segmented times where you're dealing with it versus when you're not. And it is easy to get caught up in scrolling, but you just got to remind yourself or set timers on your phone.

Or now what I try to do, and it's still a struggle, I try not to look at my phone for like the first 30 minutes when I wake up. And I think that kind of, like, helps me not be obsessed with it right away, all day. 

Nevaeh: Have you ever thought of quitting? 

Ashley: Well, I would say I have been very blessed and very lucky that I don't really think I had any low points in my career. But as far as me having doubts, there were times I did have doubts because, you know, creating content is, it can be difficult because you think about an idea, then you create the idea. And sometimes depending on what you want to create, it doesn't always come out the way you want it to, or, you know, it's just not exactly what you think it should be, is perfect. And then you post it and it doesn't get the reception that you might want. So, um, or if you're measuring yourself by growth numbers, if you feel like in six months I should have this amount of followers and I don't, those things sometimes can make you feel doubtful because you feel, like, when you're looking at other people's social media followings or their content or things like that, and you're like, I should be able to do that. Or I've been doing this longer. I should be here versus sometimes some people go viral in a couple of months. They got a few videos or a few things that they post on social media and they're, like, skyrocketing. But you just have to remember that everybody's running their own race. Social media is a highlight reel. Everything you see ain't true, and you just have to remember the things that you've been able to accomplish and the things you're working towards because if you have your own goals that you're setting and you stay focused on those, you know, sometimes you got to put blinders on and not worry about what other people are doing.

And when you do that, you, you know, you could, you just move forward towards your goals. So I would say that there were just times of doubt, but no low points, thankfully. 

Nevaeh: How do you think your life and your career will look like in 10 years by now? 

Ashley: Well, I actually just released my first physical product, which is a robe called the Hues of Harmony. It's actually a gorgeous robe. But I, in five to 10 years, I see expansion on my own physical products, uh, more, more products in the loungewear space, because that's just something that really resonates with me. I would like to own multiple properties and travel the world. 

Do you have, like, an idea of what you think you want to try or what you want to do?

Nevaeh: I think that I'll graduate from college and then I'll take time to relax and then I'll go back to school to study, like, my career and then after that I'll I'm going to sleep for the rest of my 10 years. 

Rachael: That's so funny. 

Ashley: That was a good one.

Nevaeh: I'm in middle school now and I'm very curious what your middle school experience was like. 

Ashley: Um, I think middle school for me was interesting. I'm from New York and my first year of middle school, I actually went to middle school in another state because my mother got a job in another state and so we moved. So I kind of felt like I was fumbling in the dark. I had to make new friends. I had to figure out just like a whole nother city at the same time. So I felt like I was, I did not feel grounded at all, but my second year of middle school, I came back to New York and I saw a lot of the same people that I grew up with. So I feel like my experience was a little bit better. But it was still a time in my life where I was figuring out what I was going to do next because high school was also a big deal, figuring out where you wanted to go and wanting to have more independence, but being scared because this would have been the first time I was like, maybe traveling on the train by myself or taking the bus by myself or being more independent as far as my schedule and making sure that I was getting to school on time, things like that.

So for me, middle school was, it felt like, just like uncharted territory. It was a lot of new things, newness for me with middle school. 

Nevaeh: This is my own personal question. Was you this confident in middle school too, or did you just build up your confidence? 

Ashley: Well, that's interesting because, you know, I always had, my family always made me feel like I could do anything. They always instilled in me confidence but for whatever reason, I didn't always feel confident. And I think sometimes, when you're younger, sometimes you want that validation from your friends or just from outside sources. And I would just encourage that young people listen to their family or listen to people who are telling them positive things about themselves because those are the things that are really going to help propel you in the future when you can think back to those times, rather than looking for outside validation from people who don't know you or may not really be in support of you. 

So I would say, just think about your family. If your parents are, you know, wanting to guide you in a, in the right direction. I know sometimes we don't want to listen to our parents, but even now, and I'm 35 years old, I still need my mother. Just, you know, take time to listen to people who have had experiences before you because they don't have all the answers, but they can definitely tell you what they've gone through and then you can take the pieces that you find that would be helpful for you. 

Rachael: I love that. Our final question for you is if you could go back and speak to your 13 year old self, what would you tell her?

Ashley: If I could go back and speak to my 13 year old self, I would tell her that first of all, she's going to be extremely successful and she really can do anything that she wants to do. Anything she can think of, she can make it happen but she has to be focused and, uh, you know, take herself seriously. Just believe in herself because she could do it.

Rachael: Ah, that's perfect. Thank you so much for the time you've given us today. 

Ashley: Thank you so much for having me. It was really nice meeting you both. 

Nevaeh: You too.

CREDITS

Thanks for listening to Formative, a production of New York Edge. I’m your host, Rachael Gazdick. Our production partner for this series is CitizenRacecar. This episode was produced by Hager Eldaas, post-production by Alex Brouwer, production management by Gabriela Montequin, original music by Garrett Tiedemann. Thanks to the whole team at New York Edge for making this series possible. Never miss an episode by subscribing to the series at newyorkedge.org/formative or wherever you get your podcasts.